Monday, August 26, 2013

Interrupt Your Relationship Routine

Aloha!  I am just getting back into the swing of things after spending an incredible week in Maui on The Daily Love's Maui Yoga Retreat - return to the heart.  Nearly 20 people, most of us strangers to one another, signed up for a trip to Maui. One week into the unknown...almost. We were set up for great success.  Preparations included fasting from sugars, alcohol, caffeine, dairy and gluten.  Oh yeah..... totally different than the normal routine. I visit my local Starbucks about 4 or 5 days a week.  They know my name and what I'm drinking.  I realized that it is my "Cheers" (where everybody knows your name). Physically I did not miss the caffeine.  I was grateful I had fasted from it before getting to Maui and doing Kundalini yoga twice a day.  I hydrated, rested, synced up with my body, aligned my chakras, cleared my heart and my head space, loved and was loved.  Oh, did I mention that we disconnected from our phones and the Internet for that whole entire week? Yeah, me the social media maven unplugged. It felt AMAZING....not to say it wasn't difficult, because it was, yet being with these beautiful souls (including my own) far outweighed the time I missed connecting to the outside world. I needed the time to invest in and care for me.  I learned that to be balanced and healthy, I need to interrupt my routine and invest in me. Not merely vacation, no.  Learning something new, stretching my limits, personal development, contributing to the world, disconnecting from the outside for a few days to connect and align with Spirit.

How does this relate to DATING?  Well.....  humans tend to be creatures of habit.  You know the cliches with relationship - "keep it spicy" "tend to the flame" "love deposits".... all of which imply some effort is made to grow, nurture and satisfy the relationship.  We see it all the time with married folks.... work, home......."now that we've been married two years we hardly ever go out anymore".... then she feels less special and less affectionate and he feels rejected.  We see it with married folks with children.....  they put all the kids activities before investing in their relationship and wonder why the person they fell in love with feels more like a roommate than a lover.

Planning is a great tool to support us in every aspect of our lives.  Yes, even in our relationship.  Plan those interruptions.  Please provide for your families. Please invest in your children. Please finish your degree.  Do those things.  And, interrupt them for the benefit of your relationship.  Relationships are gifts.

  • Plan a weekend getaway - no work, no phones, no Internet.  Be with each other.  
  • Plan time for personal growth where you go together - (Date with Destiny, PSI Seminars, PAX Programs couple workshops, etc)
  • Plan a celebration in the middle of an odd month, just because your love is worth it.  
  • Both of you chose something that scares you (think skydiving).  Support each other in realizing the dream.
  • Plan for time to encourage one another (notes, homemade lunches, sexy text messages, etc.)

How can you interrupt your "relationship routine"?

As always, I love to hear your thoughts and experiences.

Much love and aloha

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